Dear Martha

by Alice

Dear Martha Stewart,

I’m starting to get the jitters about my wedding checklist. You see, I’ve been right on track, MORE than on track, up to now. I picked out our venues, our caterer, our photographer. I set up our wedding website, our registry, our budget. I sent out save-the-dates, booked a honeymoon in Switzerland, and helped my FH pick out tux rentals.

But now I have my invitations in hand. And I look down and see that I’m about to fly down a hill and run into that date. April 9. I really don’t want to crash into it. I’d really rather stroll. But the items on the list are just not so easy anymore. And with every month there are more and more.

Do I really need a pampering vendor? A florist? A transportation vendor? And must I pick out my bridesmaids accessories? I think they look pretty good when they pick out their own. And the DJ list…I have a first dance song, but a cake-cutting song? An anniversary dance? A last dance? I’m sorry to inform you Martha, but I don’t even have a cake!

Also, I’m pretty sure you have “Shop for undergarments” on the list twice. (Maybe that was a mistake?)

The thing is, your checklist isn’t what I’m worried about. It seems that you suddenly got me confused with someone else when you wrote out these last four months. I know there are important things to do, but is pre-wedding pampering really one of them? I feel like I’m missing something, but your list won’t tell me. So now I’m going to avoid it and try to write my own. From others’ experiences, with the help of my friends, my mom, and let’s not forget Jon.

Thanks for your help, but Martha we’re through. But don’t take offense, because our wedding wasn’t ever about you.